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Rohwen · 02-25-2009, 10:20 PM

Hi,

I am a 20 year old college student with a binge eating disorder. As a type one diabetic I have had an odd relationship with food my entire life and have seen myself slipping into this since I was 16. Upon moving out to go to college things really picked up. I joined this forum a year ago and quickly quite. When things kept escalating this year I finally decided to get some help. I have told my parents who are super supportive and I saw a therapist (who didn't much help). While I may have had some rough times that led me here, I feel like as an overall person, I don't have a tendency to be depressed or low (though I admit to never handling stress well). While I feel I have triumphed over the hard times, I feel like I have gotten into such a nasty cycle I just can't get out, more of a vicious habit. I know I have to fix this because, I don't have the self-esteem to do all the things in life I want to do, my diabetes is hard to control while I am binging, and I feel like this is messing with my success in school. I am a premed student and I know I have the ability to achieve my goals, but when I am so caught up in my addiction, I can't focus and my grades are suffering. I am very active between work, school, my horse, my friends, and running and I know a lot about how to eat healthy, it’s just a matter of doing it. How do I break this cycle?

My family is a long ways away and while I know I did the right thing by telling them, I can't seem to really let them in on the total picture. I am ashamed and embarrassed and can't tell them the complete picture of how I feel. I don't think they realize how much this is affecting me. I feel like this is something I need help with and can't do alone. My mom has offered to help; so far I have been trying to simply email her every night telling her what I have eaten. This only adds to the shame as I find myself lying, something I have never done before and feel horrible for doing. Part of me almost wants to take some time off school to fix this, if I could just break the cycle maybe, go home and be around people who know that I have a problem and will help keep me "clean". The therapist said it takes but 30 days to start a new habit. While I am sure this is something I will have to constantly fight, I feel like if I could just make it for a while, start down a good path, I could definitely get this to a manageable point. Then again, is this only another thought of an attempt that I am sure to fail, or am I onto a bright idea?

Thoughts of you who have been through this before and won, do you have ideas on my situation. Any pointers at ways to stop the cycle?

02-25-2009, 10:20 PM	#1 (permalink)
Rohwen Member Join Date: Apr 2008 Posts: 7	Kinda a newbie: Binge Eating Disorder Hi, I am a 20 year old college student with a binge eating disorder. As a type one diabetic I have had an odd relationship with food my entire life and have seen myself slipping into this since I was 16. Upon moving out to go to college things really picked up. I joined this forum a year ago and quickly quite. When things kept escalating this year I finally decided to get some help. I have told my parents who are super supportive and I saw a therapist (who didn't much help). While I may have had some rough times that led me here, I feel like as an overall person, I don't have a tendency to be depressed or low (though I admit to never handling stress well). While I feel I have triumphed over the hard times, I feel like I have gotten into such a nasty cycle I just can't get out, more of a vicious habit. I know I have to fix this because, I don't have the self-esteem to do all the things in life I want to do, my diabetes is hard to control while I am binging, and I feel like this is messing with my success in school. I am a premed student and I know I have the ability to achieve my goals, but when I am so caught up in my addiction, I can't focus and my grades are suffering. I am very active between work, school, my horse, my friends, and running and I know a lot about how to eat healthy, it’s just a matter of doing it. How do I break this cycle? My family is a long ways away and while I know I did the right thing by telling them, I can't seem to really let them in on the total picture. I am ashamed and embarrassed and can't tell them the complete picture of how I feel. I don't think they realize how much this is affecting me. I feel like this is something I need help with and can't do alone. My mom has offered to help; so far I have been trying to simply email her every night telling her what I have eaten. This only adds to the shame as I find myself lying, something I have never done before and feel horrible for doing. Part of me almost wants to take some time off school to fix this, if I could just break the cycle maybe, go home and be around people who know that I have a problem and will help keep me "clean". The therapist said it takes but 30 days to start a new habit. While I am sure this is something I will have to constantly fight, I feel like if I could just make it for a while, start down a good path, I could definitely get this to a manageable point. Then again, is this only another thought of an attempt that I am sure to fail, or am I onto a bright idea? Thoughts of you who have been through this before and won, do you have ideas on my situation. Any pointers at ways to stop the cycle?