| I blew it BIG TIME!
I drank, I got drunk and now I can't stop! I feel like I've failed you guys! I have loved to be here, making friends, offering encouragement, celebrating recovery/sobriety... and now...
I feel so lost! Seeing all these new faces here, people truly struggling with their addictions, and I can't be of help! I want to come back and be stronger, but am feeling like this has been such an overwhelming battle for me because "I should know better"! AA/SR, you name and I've done it. Why???... is all I keep asking myself! Why can't "I" GET IT? How can anyone truly trust me? I'm chronic at relapsing!
I am not drunk right now and am on the detoxing end. It's so not pretty!! I want to get better because this is my son's birthday month (he died a few years ago) and don't want to be drunk/drinking/anesthisizing myself "once again"! Just am so down to where I feel I can't get back up! I'm sorry to you all!
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If we do not change our direction.... We are likely to end up where we're headed...!
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