Ann,
Whenever we are faced with a threatening situation we have a fight or flight response. It sounds like you had a fight resoponse with your son's situation. If there was someone else to handle your son's situation at the time, then you probably would have run. Instead you put yourself in a danagerous situation.
Usually after we have our fight response and the threat of danger is over, we then get shaky and feel the fear of what just happened.
I think our normal state of mind is flight. We run from danger. We lock our doors at night to keep ourselves safe. We avoid danger.
Right now in your life you are in your natural flight state. When you are triggered you think of the situation from a flight perspective which is fear and panic. These are feeling memories. I'd imagine you have a delayed reaction because you have kept yourself in fight mode until recently.
Don't fight the fear that you feel. Don't be afraid of the fear that you feel. Panic is the 2nd fear. It's when you are afraid of the 1st fear that you feel.
Accept the feelings and start talking yourself out of the fear. Tell yourself there is no danger and that you are safe now. Hold a big pillow to help you feel that you have boundaries. Breathe deeply and slowly. Keep telling yourself that you are ok and the feelings won't harm you. The feelings are temporary and they will go away soon. Change your focus and think about "today"
The feelings you are feeling are a normal reaction to an abnormal situation.
Hugs Ann,
MG
Reassurances:
You are in complete control. No harm will come to you at all. You are not in any danger.
The feelings of comfort will come. The feelings of discomfort will end!
You have absolutely nothing to fear. These are just harmless feelings and harmless thoughts.
It’s a bluff and a liar. You may think this is different from other panic attacks, but it is not. It’s the same old anxiety and it is benign.
Trust these stated facts. Do not trust your feelings.
Feelings come and go. You will calm down.
Coping Skills:
Slow Down! Force yourself to breathe slowly and deeply.
Repeatedly stop any negative thought, image or memory.
Be patient and let time pass. Peace and comfort lie on the other side of anxiety.
Accept the feelings, don’t fight them. Let go and don’t add 2nd fear.
Focus your attention externally. Tune out your body.
Do some thought restructuring. How likely are the feared events going to occur? How well can you cope even if they do?
Positive Affirmations:
I am healthy and very mentally sound. I am competent, and I am safe.
I am intelligent, experienced and knowledgeable.
These feelings have passed many many times before, and of course they will pass again.
I am confident, I am assured, I am loving and lovable. I get to be happy and can handle things as they arise.
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