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Old 02-13-2009, 08:37 AM   #4 (permalink)
sugErspun
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Join Date: Nov 2007
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Have you made ammends to your OH?

There's a certain shift in my view of people that happens before I am even capable of making ammends - forgiveness. One thing that I did/do if I am having trouble forgiving someone or making ammends (there are still a couple there - I am praying and 'willing to become willing' if that makes sense) - picture them as a child...for some, this really worked wonders and melted away the wall that was there. To view them as people who really have been hurt by this world - live in delusion also (without getting overly metaphysical, we all live in delusion) - anyhow, it has helped me to absolutely say "this person has been hurt too - I must clean my side of the street and set the books straight". Some people I thought I #1 - could never forgive and #2 - would NEVER make ammends to.

But I did - and no matter what they do, I just don't really get upset about some of their behaviours.

No one had to change for me to recover from alcoholism - only me...that is a wonderful promise of this whole deal.

I hope you are feeling better. Remember, this life is much bigger than our moment to moment feelings - and you only have NOW, not even a day.
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