Addies was something I fooled with whenever I could. My daughter had a scrip when she was a kid. She was taken off them eventually, but when I went back into active addiction those were one of the things I swallowed up. I wasn't addicted to them...just anything and everything placed in front of me or I could get a hold of was fair game. My addiction is drugs - period - but being a speed freak (since I was a dealer of speed, too once upon a time) addies were naturally a "good" find for me.
I can't say whether you need a detox/rehab or not. I didn't go through one, but I have been able to stay clean now for just over 4 months through working an NA program. I just had to want it bad enough. Sometimes my f*cked up head tells me I've overreacted and I don't really need the program. However - without it I could not stay clean. I've done the long periods of abstinence. My last relapse made me see I can't do "clean" alone.
I can certainly relate to your comments on taking too much, isolating and showing no emotion. I've done those for so long I'm still trying to learn how to be human again. I'm slowly getting there, though. Find an NA meeting. There are many in FL from what I understand.
Very glad you're here...
