| "Healthy Selfishness"
A long time ago a very wise man at a recovery group told me as I was leaving, "Be more selfish".
I'm pretty sure I know what he meant but it's still confusing to me. To me 'selfish' has always been a bad word. It means 'self-centered', 'greedy', and having a lack of compassion.
But I think what he meant was "Put your needs first".
Sort of like the oxygen mask scenario; always put yours on before you help someone else put on theirs.
I realized after a recent experience (where I gave in to drinking), that I was putting my safety second to the possibility of someone's feelings getting hurt. Then I started to realize how many times I've done that same thing.
I seem to be attracted to or by people who are in crisis. There was a time I lent someone money when I didn't really have it to give away and then found out they lied to me for the reason they needed it.
I am wondering if this is co-dependent behavior and something I should look into.
But does anyone else have an interpretation of what Healthy Selfishness means to them?
Thank you,
LD
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