Welcome to SR.. everyone has been very nice. The common reaction here is the group hug approach, my reaction isn't.
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Originally Posted by houston28  My basic problem is that I am not in love with my wife and I don't know if I ever was..... I had my doubts but I wanted to do the right thing so I married her. |
And then brought two more children into a loveless marriage?
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Originally Posted by houston28 I told her that I didn't love her as a woman but I do as the mother of our children and that I think we should separate. |
You told her this a few weeks from her coming back from rehab? Your timing sucks.
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Originally Posted by houston28 I always thought maybe having children meant having to sacrifice many things which is true but I am not so sure about having to sacrifice my happiness. |
Look man I'm not trying to be a jerk and I've made plenty of mistakes myself, but I'm not buying this whole speil about you falling on your own sword because you're such a good guy. I'm guessing your entire marriage was tainted by a subtle resentment on your part, probably contributing to your wifes unhappiness. What's done is done so lets look at the real problem.
Get a good lawyer and get educated about your rights as a Father. Treat your girls mother with respect and support her attempt at sobriety as much as you can WITHOUT jeopardizing the emotional health of the girls. I hope for your childrens sake their mother can get and stay sober with her entire world crashing around her, (loss of her Father, struggling with an addiction, marriage out the window... man if she can survive this she's one tough cookie). Your girls will be much better off with a sober mother in their lives so I wish her luck.
It's just these types of posts that scream out the children are hurt more than ANYONE. Sorry if this seems harsh but it's a huge hot button for me. Oh... and if I were you I'd get a vasectomy.