| Powerfully Recoverd
False modesty has been a severe shortcoming for me in the past.
Used to be that I couldn't take a compliment, much less a criticism. Some one would compliment me on a talk I gave and I would usually say something "Well, it really wasn't me, it was God," or something like that. It took me a long time to be able to say a simple "Thank You."
I would try to fit my message in AA to who I thought was listening. I would be apolgetic for my experience and for my faith. All so others would not be uncomfortable. The one that was uncomfortable was me. At some point I decided no more tip-toeing around and walking on eggshells so that someone's sensitive little alcoholic feelings won't get hurt. Like Popeye said "I AM who I AM." I AM what God made me to be. Where I AM God is. The Carpenter didn't apologize for being the son of God. He made the bold statement that I AM. And they killed him for telling the truth.
Marianne Williamson wrote something that I find appropriate here:
Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate,
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
(With power comes responsibility. Most of us would rather stay powerless, in the dark, and irresponsible)
It is our light, not our darkness that frightens us.
We ask ourselves "Who am I to be brilliant gorgeous, talented, fabulous?"
Actually who are you not be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other
people won't feel insecure around you.
We are born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It is not just in some of us, it is in everyone, and as we let our light shine,
we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our fears, our very presence liberates others.
Powerful stuff. We tap into real power here, and it is power to live by. Sometimes more than I know what to do with, because just like lack of power can be a dilemma, power can be a dilemma if I don't know what to do with it.
The book tells me what to do with it. I have recovered and have been given the power to help others. Ebby knew that when he called on Bill. Bill saw something radically different about Ebby and wondered what had gotten into him. What had gotten into Ebby was God and he didn't apologize for it. Instead he made the point blank declaration that God gad done for him what he couldn't do for himself. Dr. Bob didn't apologize for it in his story either. The old-timers knew what they had tapped into.
I have been asked why I am so arrogant. Why shouldn't I be utterly confident in the Presence of God?
Jim
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