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PB, I know what you mean. My first time around with AA was in April and I didn't go for very long. I thought that I could drink in moderation. At first, I was only drinking on the weekends, then I started drinking everyday. After work I would either go to the bar with friends, or drop by the liquor store and pick up a bottle and take it home. Even though I knew I had a problem, I got to the point where I just didn't really care anymore. I thought that it was the American way. Everyone and anyone I know drinks. I would read articles on how good wine was for the heart. But drinking more than one glass a day was probably not doing mine much good. I made a lot of excuses for why I drank. I had a bad day at work so therefore I need a drink, or I was having anxiety so I should drink to numb it. I couldn't get away from it. And in fact, I really didn't want to. I'm still struggling with this, but I realize that I am indeed powerless over alcohol. I guess since I realize this maybe I still have a chance. I am hopeful that I will not relapse this time around. I just know that I will not drink today, but I don't know about tomorrow.
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