[mellowchick]

I refer to them as nightmares since dreams have been more pleasant. Weird, I know. Anyway, I get the awful sweats (sometimes to the point that my hair is drenched) my breathing becomes more rapid and most of the time I wake up crying. I don't really remember anything about these nightmares other than my addiction being the dominating factor, it varies from my popping tons of pills, shooting, smoking or whatever to get my fix. I hate these nightmares and I often have a hard time letting myself sleep out of fear for another nightmare. I've talked with my counselor about these nightmares and she has told me on several occasions that its like a reminder of who I was, where I came from, who I am today and what I've gone through to get where I am today. I don't think I will ever forget the person I was and every day I look in the mirror I see who I am today and how far I've come in my recovery. Do the nightmares ever go away? I know each day in recovery is an achievement. I just want a little more piece of mind at night when I lay my head down. Does that piece of mind come with more time in recovery? Does it ever get better? Do the nightmares ever go away?