[Pam08]

I am very early in recovery from Alcohol. This is day 8 for me, been struggling with this for months now. I am putting all I have in me to make it. I so want that 30 day chip. Anyway. To me it is so confusing, is it the quitting drinking that I feel this way, am I that depressed, or anxiety, or combination. How do we figure out exactly what is going on inside of our minds. When I am around people, I seem to be fine, as I was for a couple days this past weekend. I come home and back down I go. I need to find work and don't have the umph to do it. I need to clean and do stuff here, but just do not seem to be able to do anything I need to do. I am on welbutrin and do not beleive it is doing a thing for me. I go see the nurse in a couple weeks and will see about that. People talk about depression, anxiety, bi polar, etc etc. Such confusing stuff when you are feeling you have no clue what is wrong. I have felt horrible bout me for along time and it is not lifting, I feel like I lost that desire to do stuff I need to do. But I am willing and okay to do what I did last weekend. and that was volunteer work. I need a paycheck, husband cut me off...How do I motivate me, get myself out of this rut, In my head I think if I was working making some money I would feel better, but here i am, still not working. Any suggestions appreciated, or anyone whom can connect.