Typically, bipolar disorder first starts showing up with noticible symptoms in late teens or early 20's. With the psychotic episode, this points to Bipolar I. Being bipolar I, means he will struggle with mania and these psychotic episodes throughout his life IF he doesn't get on and STAY on a mood stabalizer like Lithium or something else. A psychiatrist may also want him on an anti-psychotic.
Him using pot....is nothing you can control, IN MY OPINION. I think punishing him may just make him less likely to want to communicate with you at all...and do the opposite of anything you say.
Research shows that around 80 percent of bipolars become addicted to some substance. And is usually discribed as a way for the person to try and self-medicate the illness (without realizing there's any connection).
He's actually VERY lucky to get a diagnosis so early in his life...it means that he can start learning to manage it BEFORE it starts distroying his life. The longer he goes without proper medication maintence from and mood stabalizer and other....the more rebellious he will likely be for the rest of his life about taking meds.
Why? Because those with BPI have manic episodes...and that's like a 'high' all on it's own. Mood stabalizers help lessen any manic or depressive episodes. If he doesn't spend much time experiences the highs of manias....then when on a mood stabliazer he won't be so quick to complain about them making him feel 'flat' or 'numb' like many BP I's do.
This is all my opinion and from what I've researched and experienced as a bipolar II, and from knowing a few bipolar I's also. I am not a doctor. So please see that he starts regular appointments with a psychiatrist for medication manegement....and many will also recommend him seeing a psychologist for regular therapy sessions.
Like I said, I'm not a doctor, but frankly I think the pot had very little, if anything, to do with your son's psychotic episode. But even if it did....him staying away from pot is NOT going to put any kind of end to these and other episodes. In fact, in most people....pot tends to 'chill' the person out....which might actually help keep him from showing more manic symptoms than he has been. (although, apparently pot does energize some...and if that's the case with him then it will only make the bipolar I worse, IMO).
My other suggestion would be to take a look at your family history and his dad's side....for more addiction issues or mental illness issues. With addiction issues....typically comes mental illness issues in family lines. Bipolar disorder is very genetic....and if both the mother and father of a child have bipolar disorder then the child is around 70% likely to also develope the illness. But look closely at the family backgrounds because bipolar II disorder is NOT as easy to recognize as bipolar I. Why? Because we don't have full blown manic episodes or psychotic episodes....instead....our main symptoms come on as deep, deep depressions....and research shows 1 in 5 bipolars end up committing suicide (that data does not seperate bipolar I from bipolar II....but BP I's tend to be more quick to react to thoughts.... very impuslive...which puts them in danger of suicide).
Please take this diagnosis serious. If you start learning about the illness...the more you will be able to see how it has weaved it's way thru you and/or his dad's families....and how he is likely to carry on the gene to any of his kids in the future. That's why education is key.....without him understanding WHY he needs to be on meds....he will have a much harder time going thru life and much more of a risk of suicide or more, worse addiction issues.
My suggestion is to talk to him calmly, with a knowledgable professional present, to explain the illness to him (WITHOUT mention of the pot). This is his illness...and therefore he has the right to be a part of his own treatment of it. And any and all education he can get about it....he will carry on with him...always....even when he doesn't have a mom or dad to try and FORCE him to do the right thing.
p.s. I am not an advocate FOR pot, and don't do it myself, but i am also not against it's use for medical purposes. And i also think, the harder you come down on him about it at age 17....the harder he will use it when he is out on his own and he feels free from any parental restrictions. So.....again....education as to why it could be harmful to him...is key and really all you can do, in my opinion only.
p.s.s. An awsome book to read for insight and great information about bipolar I, is "A Brilliant Madness" by Patty Duke. If you look on Barnes & Noble site....they usually have used copies in near perfect condition for only a $1 or $2.
p.s.s.s. the web site
NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness offers good information about bipolar disorder and addiction issues.
Jenna