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For me, my life had been unmageable for along time but I never considered that was because of me. I.e. my drinking
I just thought if people were a bit kinder to me and gave me a bit of a break then I would be okay. It was your fault I was the way I was.
After a year in AA, I become obsessed with drinking and drunk half a bottle of wine in a park at 11am with my 3 year old daughter.
The idea then seemed rather logical that maybe I was powerless and I couldn't control my drinking, as that really wasn't what I had wanted to be doing.
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