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Journeygal,
I know that my post could make you think that to a point. Generalizing is just that, make a general wide spread statement. Look at it this way, relationships always have control games when there is some sort of committment involved. As children we test our parents, we play control games. Parents do the same to children. Men and women in committed relationships do the same thing.
My issue with the compliments, is overplaying them. You have to really watch what you are complimenting in dating. Saying a woman is hot, is not as much a compliment as saying I want in your shorts... Saying I like how you curled your hair is personal and thoughful. Saying I want you so bad constantly, grovelling, buying everything for them, it makes you look desperate, and quite frankly is probably an accurate perception of someone who does that. It begs to be walked on.
My approach is just to be me. I don't lie, I don't kiss butt, I don't send bunches of gifts. I have no problem with dating more than one person at a time. I don't hide it if asked. I don't consider a second or third or fourth date a committment. I don't expect that out of them either. If things progress further, then that conversation could spark up. I have not and never will cheat on someone I am seeing exclusively. And I will not ever go on a date with someone who is engaged, married, or has a steady boyfriend.
Again, I don't like the cocky look at my job, car, good looks or muscle approach. A good woman will see right through that. It is just the balance between the two extremes. Being nice is necessary and should be natural. I hope this explains a little more.
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