I put off filing for disability for far too long, continued to work jobs that aggravated my degenerative disc disease, racked up over 7 grand in medical bills (and that was with health insurance), and tomorrow I finally have my disability hearing.
I completely understand all the feelings you are having, and I sank into such a deep depression late last year that I was thinking suicidal thoughts every day.
I have been in therapy since then, see a psychiatrist regularly for medication evaluations, and asked Vocational Rehabilitation to help me come up with a plan for advancing myself in life.
Today I am enrolled in college full-time, all my classes are online so that I can be comfortable at home with my orthopedic cushion and ergonomic computer chair. I will graduate with a degree that will allow me to work in an environment that doesn't have me on my feet all day, which is how I ended up with all those medical bills in the first place.
For the first time in years I have hope and don't feel trapped. I don't want to be on disability forever, and I am working towards becoming self-sufficient by finishing my college education.
I encourage you to reach out to other resources for help, including Vocational Rehabilitation.
I feel your pain and despair!
