loner,
What do you have to be grateful for?
Do start a gratitude journal. It's important to rmember, especially in our darkest days, that there is some good in the world. Reach deep; don't think big; even the smallest of things that bring us joy count.
So, name one thing for which you are grateful....
And then, add on to it each day.
Soon, you'll have a book to refer to when you're down in the dumps,
and that book can lift you up again!
Shalom!