Quote:
Originally Posted by Astro 
Specifics? The Little Red Book suggests that "We come clean with God and make amends to loyal friends and relatives except when to do so might be harmful to them or others".
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I would also be well considered in how much detail I go into.
The facts:
You did it in the past. It is over and has been for years. You are sorry.You are sorry for causing any pain and sorrow in her life. It will never happen again.
Aside from owning your role in the actions of the past, and sticking to the facts I don't see how furnishing her with dates, times and locations will NOT cause more harm to others.
In general, unless a spouse is already aware of an infidelity from the past, I caution against interfering with their now intact and ongoing marriage. Did she already know that you two had had an affair in the past?
Otherwise, telling this woman now may cause harm to her husband or to their family.
This is a case that each of us must decide for ourselves, but I know for myself, I make living amends by vowing never to live a lie or a self centered deceit involving a partner, ever again. Its built in as part of my sobriety.