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When I drank on top of Prozac, Zoloft as well as various tricyclic depressants I not only slurred my words but had bouts of amnesia and muddled words up. I was too afraid to tell the doctor -- when he prescribed them for me at various points I didn't say I was an alcoholic and that I couldn't help drinking on top of everything I was given. I probably also hoped that I would stop if the depression lifted -- but as the depression was alcohol-induced, that didn't happen.
Not everyone believes alcoholism is an illness of denial, but while drinking I couldn't tell anyone the truth about most things, and I was lying to myself as much as to others. I would assure myself that I would be able to stop if the situation was serious enough because I wasn't alcoholic and had control over my drinking. I had no control and the illusion of control was just another lie.
I would say to doctors that I was worried about the side effects of medication and not realise that two or three litres of wine each day, or a a bottle and a half of vodka was quite enough to impair my health.
I am so grateful I made it through all that and was able to sober up in AA.
Thanks
Mala
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