Hello...I totally understand how you feel. I have my moments when i feel the same way. It is hard, I have never been able to be completly honest with things, with anyone. I try to shut it all out, and pretend that everything in the past never existed. But the reality of it is, it still haunts me from time to time. The lingering memories that you try to shut out, when all you want to do is move on. But................on a lighter note, look at it this way....those who talk and whisper have nothing better to do...it makes them feel better about themselves to have someone else to talk about. A real friend/companion, will see you for you, and realize that everyone has a past. Your past makes you who you are today...everything happens for a reason, and in some weird way it helped you develop into the good person you are today. Imagine one of those people going through some of the stuff that you did, they couldn't handle it. Now, that you have experienced what you have, if you are put back in a similar situation you might make a different decision, That is what makes you a strong person. I look at it this way...Take me as I am or f&*$ you.....that is how I look at things.......it is hard to have that attitude all the time, but keep that in mind and believe it or not it works..
The past is History,The future a mystery...today is a gift, that's why it's the present...
Good Luck.........
