pat555

I'm new here---Been attending Al-Anon for almost 2 years because of alcoholic husband. Life before Al-Anon was unbearable. Now I'm learning about myself and what I have brought to this situation and how to deal with things better. Still have long way to go and struggle with anger issues, particularly in regards to my husband. To better try and understand his situation, it was suggested that I try Open AA meetings, which I did. I loved them! Can relate to everything said. I loved them so much I wanted to go to the closed meetings. The more I go--the more I want to go to the AA meetings.

A friend who is a recovering alcoholic felt there may be more to my desire to attend the AA meetings than just trying to understand my husband. Thought maybe "I" had some underlying alcohol issues. As we have discussed my "drinking history" it does look like I could be alcoholic. However, after I became a mother (4 kids, 16-23), I basically drank little. There have been times when I have had way too much (including at least one black out), which was about 8 years ago. Generally, I don't drink much, but when I do, it usually is more than a couple. I'm told Alcoholism is a patient disease just waiting for the opportunity to come back----and that a likely time would be when all my kids are out of the house.

**I have been told there is a "drinking" test for alcoholism. Have exactly one drink of your choice for 30 days straight, made exactly the same way. No variations, so skipping days---and that how I handle that will help to indicate if I am an alcoholic. IS THIS A JOKE????????? Could there be any truth to this. I have already taken the AA question test--and if I answered the questions as I would have prior to children, the answer would be YES. Does that change things?

I'm confused and would appreciate any input or suggestions. Thanks very much and I'm sorry this is so long!! I tend to get wordy!