Balance in life...
Hello all-
I have a question about achieving balance between recovery and the rest of my life.
To make a long story short, after 20 yrs. of drinking (getting progressively worse the last few years) and five stints in rehab/day treatment/IOP over the last four months, I (thank God) think that I have finally received the blessing of the desire to quit and get sober once and for all.
I have been on sick leave due to the rehabs. Since I finally got into going to meetings it was easy to find one every day to attend. I went back to work three days ago. The problem is, what I was afraid was going to happen HAS happened.
My work schedule is extremely hectic. Up at 3:30am, to work by 5:00am, leave work at 5:30pm, get back home by 6:30/7:00pm, hit an 8:00pm meeting, get home by 9:30pm, in bed by 10:00pm or so.
This may not be a big deal for others, but getting only 5-6 hours of sleep a night with little to no family time is difficult for me to do.
My original goal was to go to meetings every day. 90 in 90. I am seeing where this is going to potentially get a little screwy.
I also work on Saturdays most of the time.
I am concerned about the amount of time I am going to be spending away from the family. I know that my recovery is of utmost importance, but I also have to put time into recovery of my marriage and family. I just about lost them this last time. The only reason I haven't is through the extreme patience and love of my wife. Call her co-dependent maybe (probably), but she just didn't get to the point of totally throwing in the towel. She got close though due to my drinking and pushing her and the family away.
They are not living at home right now, and I guess after everything I can't expect them to just jump right back in and come home so soon with all of the reservations that everyone has. That's understandable. I just feel that I need to be available to spend good quality time with them. The weekends is the only time I can do it.
I guess the big question is this - as a relative newcomer to AA, would it suffice to go to four or five meetings a week instead of every day? I am not saying this because I do not want to go, just because I feel I owe my family some time; I owe them the time I stole from them due to my disease.
If I knuckle down, get a sponsor, and work an honest program, I feel that I could take the weekends off.
Is this a bad idea?