[nandm]

((((((easeful))))))))))) What a difficult situation to be in. It is never easy to watch someone we love be taken over by mental illness especially when they will not allow others to help them in the areas they need help. One thing that might be helpful is to remember that it is the disease that is in control right now rather than the person. Her refusal of help, demanding behaviors are all signs of the disease. It truly has nothing to do with you personally. No matter who was trying to help I am sure they would be recieving the same response. Her calling the nursing home may be an attempt to manipulate you into doing what she demands. Try to separate the individual from the disease and realize it isn't about you personally. Maybe that would make it easier to deal with. It sounds like the nursing home might be the best place for her. Do they have assisted living where you are at? If so that might be a good option. Here assisted living is where they have their own apartment but their meals are cooked in a dining room, their meds are given out by a med aid, their housecleaning and laundry is taken care of by care givers. It still allows them freedom but helps to ensure their needs are being met. It is more of an intermediate step between home and a nursing home. Many people thrive in the assisted living environment.