[GINVU4RANDOM]

The title of this thread probably makes me look like I'm in denial. I'm classic bulimic as in I binge eat, throw up on average every other day for a few months, then I eat virtually nothing for a few months and lose loads of weight then I start eating again, put on weight, so start making myself sick again. This cycle has been going on since I guesS I was about 12, so 10 years or so.

I'm 23, 5ft 6, 9/9.5 stone (about 55-60kg) at the moment. In my none eating stages I go down to about 8.5 stone. So I'm not underweight.

The thing is, although all the information I have read has obviously told me that this is builimia. But I dont do it cause I feel out of control with my life like alot of people with eating disorders do. I don't think I'm fat (sure I love losing weight, but I have never thought I am fat, I'm size 8 (America size 4?)) I also have never had any of the pyhsical effects (rotting teeth, sore knuckles, bad skin etc) and I don't really 'emotionally eat'

I just love food! I love chocolate, biscuits, burgers, big roast dinners, thai, all the bad stuff so I make myself sick so I don't get big. I don't have an off switch!

Although I don't see it as a big problem, like a lot of people with eating disorders when it takes over your life and controls you, it doesn't with me. Its just something I do, something I have always done so I can eat what I like and stay slim. Although in the past there has been periods of time when it has got bad and I have occasionally wish I could stop eating altogether, I know thats bad, but sometimes I wish I could get really really skinny. I know its really not attractive etc but sometimes I just wish I could.

I wanted to see if anyone could help me, I don't know, I guess sometimes its good to get things off your chest. Is this how others feels, like its not a problem?

I'm addicted to cocaine so am battling that at the moment, I think I have an addictive personality, so is it possible to be actually addicted to food?

Just any thoughts really....