Hello. I don't know why I keep smoking weed. It's such a destroyer for me! For almost everyone I know it's no big deal but it's really doin' me in. I used to like it but now I don't like what it does to me...so why do I keep smoking it??? I think I feel worthless, coz all it does is make me feel paranoid and useless...still, I keep on smoking it..it's like I always think it's gonna be different this time, but on the other hand I know full well that it's not..It just totally flattens me out and I become scared, anxious and paranoid..empty...I must be running away from something..since i've done it for years. Am I just being stupid??
Am I just "using anything" to get away?? what's wrong with me??
I also suffer from social anxiety but I got it pretty well under control, except from when I smoke weed...And still I keep on doing it. I feel absolutely pathetic! And then I do everything to hide my insecurities from my friends...I take on a roll...
I also like to drink..a lot! It's usually binges in the weekends. What's happening to me...sorry, I'm just confused!
e088:
