Quote:
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Today, I will work at developing a clear sense of what belongs to me, and what doesn't. If it's not mine, I won't keep it. I will deal with my issues, my responsibilities, and myself. I will take my hands off what is not mine.
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Learning to define ownership
before I got drawn in (or willingly marched right in) was a new experience for me. Was I not in control of my family/my child/my job/my neighbourhood/the world? Nope, no matter how much I tried to take ownership of other people and their behaviour it just wasn't mine to own.
If someone is angry, even at ME, and is rude or aggressive verbally....I don't own it, he does. Even if his anger is justified, his tone and behaviour is not. I walk away/hang up/disconnect/remove myself from this situation quickly. I'll talk all night to anyone who can maintain respect in their behaviour or voice but I will never tolerate disrespect because "my reaction" is the only part of this equation that I own.
His action = his consequence. If I rob him of the consequence, I have robbed him of the lesson....hands off the consequence.
Sometimes I have to take a giant step back and ask myself "Does this have MY name written all over it?" If it does not, I don't own it.
Hugs