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Old 04-25-2008, 04:58 PM   #2 (permalink)
51anna
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Dancing in the Light
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I was a secret drinker too and what bothered my husband the most was the lying.

I wouldn't say that he punished me, but there was definitely distance. And, for a very long time I didn't dare talk about my needs or feelings. I had so much guilt, I was just working very hard to try to make things better.

If you're done being punished and he is not ready to really forgive you, then it's a problem you need to work on. Being patient is very hard. At three months, your husband may still be wondering what is going to happen. What I learned in early sobriety is that you don't have control over the things you wish you could control.
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"I don't know what the future is holding in store
I don't know where Im going, Im not sure where Ive been
Theres a spirit that guides me, a light that shines for me
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John Denver

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