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LegalLady · 04-02-2008, 09:11 AM

Some have asked what step I'm on
Step three
Its a hard one for me. Not because I don't believe in God. but cause I have a hard time believing in him for me. That's dumb I know. I'm working with that.
I've been to meetings everyday, some times twice and also Alanon meetings because my father was an alcoholic (he is dead). its been like 45 or 46 days or something. so I go every day or sometimes twice, and I call my sponsor at least three times a week and see her at meetings. But, I don't feel nothing, still empty.
and I find myself listening to people, mostly the new comers and thinking they are full of it.
I think I should listen to the people with some sobriety under their belt and let the people with the sobriety under their belt listen to the newcomers.
I don't know. I'm just sick of people getting his spiritual awaking after 10 days and I'm struggling at 40 something. I'm going everyday, and reading and writing and spilling my guts. I'm getting nothing but well, I'll just say it. Ticked off. I think I'm a jerk and I don't want to be. Some one said today if everything goes my way I'm having a good day and if everything don't go my way and I don't drink, I'm having a great day. Well if that's true, I'm having some GREAT Days.
I feel like such a sack of potatos.

04-02-2008, 09:11 AM	#1 (permalink)
LegalLady Member Join Date: Oct 2007 Location: Missouri Posts: 179	You ask what step I'm on Some have asked what step I'm on Step three Its a hard one for me. Not because I don't believe in God. but cause I have a hard time believing in him for me. That's dumb I know. I'm working with that. I've been to meetings everyday, some times twice and also Alanon meetings because my father was an alcoholic (he is dead). its been like 45 or 46 days or something. so I go every day or sometimes twice, and I call my sponsor at least three times a week and see her at meetings. But, I don't feel nothing, still empty. and I find myself listening to people, mostly the new comers and thinking they are full of it. I think I should listen to the people with some sobriety under their belt and let the people with the sobriety under their belt listen to the newcomers. I don't know. I'm just sick of people getting his spiritual awaking after 10 days and I'm struggling at 40 something. I'm going everyday, and reading and writing and spilling my guts. I'm getting nothing but well, I'll just say it. Ticked off. I think I'm a jerk and I don't want to be. Some one said today if everything goes my way I'm having a good day and if everything don't go my way and I don't drink, I'm having a great day. Well if that's true, I'm having some GREAT Days. I feel like such a sack of potatos.