[Taffletips]

I am brand new to this site and have yet to figure it out but I know I need to get this written down. (I posted this in a blog yesterday and was recommended to post it here in a thread.) Hope it's not too long.

Last week I came home from work and my husband was in bed with a fever. I felt so bad for him because he never gets sick...he's almost a genetic freak on how little he gets sick. Anyway, we were up for the next two nights pretty much all night because of his vomiting and being unable to get comfortable. The next night (Friday night) I fell asleep quickly because he wasn't feeling nauseous anymore and wasn't fidgeting. Then about midnight he wakes me telling me that someone was in the house. It was really windy and I thought that was what he heard. However, he had me so convinced that I finally got scared and told me we better check it out. We go downstairs and he turns to me and says, "You know." I was didn't know what he was talking about. He keeps going on about how I knew that someone was in the house. I got mad after 10 minutes of this because I had been fast asleep and how would I have known! So we're laying there and he goes, "Here they come." I still didn't hear anything but I'm scared and shaking by this point. For a couple of hours, we layed there waiting. By this point I'm thinking he's having an allergic reaction to some medicine he took for the flu (Mucinex) or that he snapped from the fever or something. Finally at about 5 in the morning he falls asleep...restfully...but asleep. The next day he seems himself, however, the next night we go through the same thing but this time after a few hours he starts vomiting again. The same thing happened the next two nights but the paranoia turns into the police coming for him and hiding in the house. At this point, I'm not worried anyone's in the house, so i go and check everything 10 times. However, he believes I'm in on the whole "operation". I try to ask him why the hell he thinks the police are coming for him. But he thinks that I'm trying to get something on tape or that they're listening, etc. I almost called for help the night before last because I thought that I needed to take him to the emergency room but he refused to go. Then he started making himself throw up to get something that was stuck in his throat. I dunno... Anyway, yesterday he wasn't himself during the day. He wanted me to ride with me to his job so we went but I dropped him off because I had to run errands. Every few minutes he called me asking where I was and who was in the background or what was that noise and so on. He did this until I picked him up about an hour later and took him home because he said he was tired. Oh, I forgot to mention that he was drinking at least a gallon of gatorade or water a night. I couldn't keep enough gatorade in the house. So after I picked him up from work I dropped him at the house and went to get more drink at the store. When I got home he was telling me that I knew they were here and why wouldn't I tell him the truth. The same conversation we'd been having for the past 4 or 5 nights but it was more intense and more frantic. It took me over 2 hours to get him to tell me why the police would even want to come for him. He said he's been partying. I asked him how he could of been partying when we're together almost all time besides when we're at work. Of course, me asking that made him think it was part of the plan to arrest him. So it took some time before he told me he'd been partying by himself. So, he's a recovering alcoholic as far as I know, so I asked if he'd been drinking. He said no. I asked if he'd done drugs, he said yes. Then he told me speed and coke. I was floored. However, all the weird behavior just came together. I never ever suspected that. I really thought it was medical or his disease (Parkinson's) not drugs. So he got really panicky then. And screamed at me that I knew they were coming for him and how could I do that. I got out of the house and called two very close friends of both of ours (they're pretty much family) to help me. They stayed with him until he was through the paranoia but told me to stay at their house last night. Now, he thinks I've abandoned him and that he wants a divorce and how could I leave without saying I loved him. Last night before I left I tried to talk to him but he was telling everyone he wouldn't talk to me because I was in on it. I don't know anymore. I want him to get help, I want my husband back. But I know he has to do it or he'll just resent me if I make him get help. I don't know what to do. Do I stay and see what he does or do I leave and hope he does the right thing? My parents don't want me here until he's on the right path. I don't want to abandon him but I DO want him to get well and work on getting better. I'm confused. Thanks for reading and letting me vent.