I agree with LaTeeDa on this. Why would I want a relationship with an A; particularly one who is selfish and manipulative? Also, what does conflicted sexuality have to do with this? Okay, here goes ... trying to diagnose an alkie's sexuality, codependency, irrationality, selfishness, manipulative techniques, etc., leads to one thing - OUR OWN INSANITY.
Here's what I learned about myself. I married two A's. That told me that I had a ton of my own emotional issues. It also told me that I was avoiding myself by placing all my focus on, "Why did he do that?" or "What made him do this?"
Here's what I learned about the addicts: I never figured out a doggone thing they did because they were both looney from all the booze. I did manage to trash my own sanity (what little I had of it), my health, my finances, my well-being, self-esteem, and anything else remotely "normal" that I may have possessed.
All I can do is work on figuring out my own problems. And that in itself is enough to keep me busy the rest of my life ...