5
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Of course, we sometimes encounter people who do not understand alcoholics.
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This is a good reason to choose a sponsor. Someone who has taken the steps can show us what they have done. Someone "armed with facts about themselves" can be very helpful to us as we seek the truth about ourselves. Our sponsor will understand our need to be absolutely honest.
8-11
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It may be one of our own family, but we cannot disclose anything to our wives or our parents which will hurt them and make them unhappy. We have no right to save our own skin at another person's expense. Such parts of our story we tell to someone who will understand, yet be unaffected. The rule is we must be hard on ourself, but always considerate of others.
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This is one of the only rules in this book. Do we have such a lack of concern for the well being of others that we would try to gain relief for ourselves at their expense? We are attempting to gain freedome from selfishness.
12-14
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Notwithstanding the great necssity for discussing ourselves with someone, it may be one is so situated that there is no suitable person available. If that is so, this step may be postponed, only, however, if we hold ourselves in complete readiness to go through with it at the first opportunity. We say this because we are very anxious that we talk to the right person.
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The right person will understand the spiritual necessity of discussing our shortcomings with them. We gain humility through this step. Our ego, our conscious separation from God and our fellows, is decreased by admitting our faults to others. Admitting our wrongs and taking the steps to make matters right eliminates the guilt we feel. When a matter has been righted, the pangs of remorse we now feel are replaces with spiritual experience from which we may draw strength. Our worst failings, when coupled with humility become the tools God uses to help others.
Source:
The Annotated AA Handbook
Frank D