[appleblaster]

Abundance, I know exactly what you're going through with an exabf (the "a" is for addict and alcoholic) who has mood swings that I cannot keep up with. This past weekend for example, I saw him go from the sweetest, most caring person taking care of me while I was sick to a yelling, character-assassin. He latched onto the most insignificant thing and ran with it. He had promised that I could lay in bed and get better, that he would rent movies for me and all I had to do was sit there and look pretty. That was totally ruined with him treating me as disposable again.
Now, he hasn't done this in some time so it took me by surprise. But he's abusing Adderall, alcohol and a few other items thrown in the mix. His life has truly become unmanageable at this point. He doesn't drink as much b/c of the Adderall but he takes a ridiculous amount of it.
He's admitted that i'm the only friend he has. He's pretty much driven everyone else away. He does not keep people around often with the exception of me.
To answer the basic questions, yes i'm codependent as discovered through dating him. Yes, I go to Al-Anon meetings which is why i'm not taking any of this personally. I'm very thankful I had interactions with him b/c it led me to my own road of recovery. Also yes, I realize that i'm talking a lot about him and not me. Giving some background for my questions.
He mentioned a while back that someone suggested to him that he may be bipolar.
So at the moment we're on the "outs" as we have been many times before, but not recently. I know what he needs to do......see the problem for himself and seek to have it helped by a professional. But i'm not sure what I need to do. My instincts are to run as fast as I can in the opposite direction but as soon as I begin to put distance between us I begin to feel guilty. As if there is still something I may have to contribute to his discovery/recovery. But also that could be the codependent ego in me, thinking that I have the answers. I feel compelled to at least back up the suggestion that he may be bipolar. As in the past, he will come calling back and i'm angry. People aren't disposable. I'm not disposable.
I'm trying to allow God to give me the queues and signals as I realize that if its His will that i'm in this man's life then that's how it must be. But i'm confused and guilt does me in.
We've been apart for long periods of time before and he just goes on as usual then puts his tail between his legs and calls me. Then I feel like as long as I come back (for whatever reason) i'm standing in the way of his recovery. Then I speak my mind with him and sometimes he actually hears me.
Like you Abundance i'm all over the place. I appreciate any input anyone may have or at least thank you for allowing me to get this out.