|
Step 5 was a great experience for me. Prior to going over to my sponsor's house I sat down and prayed asking God to help me see the truth in this process. I then read pages 70-75 in the first person to get clear on what I am about to do. As the book says, this is a life and death errand. It is about the life of my spirit and the death of self. It was the first time in my life that i had an opportunity to have God begin to strip me of ego. It was the first real experience of humility. While all of the steps take some humility, this was a big one for me. I found the quiet hour very important. It was then that I realized I was having a spiritual experience and that I did indeed know God better. I belonged in this world and God loves me, defects and virtues. I also realized that I left out two important resentments on my inventory, resentment towards myself, and resentment towards God, church and organized religion in general. I thought about those during inventory, but I would put another one down on paper instead. Weird how things you have intention of putting on paper get lost in your head. We talked about it the next morning. And my sponsor laughed, he said," most people leave something out, but it's usually something sexual" And then he said, " You know, we are hardest on ourselves, we've talked about it now, and you have an assignment to complete your defects list." A powerful experience. For once somebody knows everything about me. And did not pass judgement.
|