[trakin]

Thanks to those of you who listened to my first post here yesterday. Thanks for your responses. I guess it's true. I am an alchoholic. Even though I don't drink all the time, and manage to hide it...it just can't be right to not be able to stop drinking once I start, and the blackouts -- those are not good at all.

I intend to stop drinking. I hope I can do it, but I'm scared. I'm surrounded by people who drink, but most don't seem to have the problem with it that I do.

Here's my usual pattern: I drink too much on the weekends. I get bad hangovers, I feel full of guilt and regret. I waste time. I don't get nearly as much done as I would like to. I decide I will cut down on my drinking. I decide that from now on, I will limit myself to two drinks only. During the week, I don't drink at all. I eat well, excercize, do my work, etc. By the time Friday rolls around, I usually feel very good and healthy, and because of this, I think...I must have been mistaken last weekend ...I can't possibly have a drinking problem! I am healthy, happy, productive ...there's just no way I could be an alcoholic. Then I stop and pick up a bottle of wine, promising myself that I will most definitely stop at two drinks. And I feel positive that I can, indeed, do that!

Cut to the following morning: empty wine bottle in the kitchen, headache, nausea, guilt, regret, no memory of what I did or said last night....Yuck.

It's happened one too many times. I know need to change my life now, before it gets too late. Next Friday, I intend to skip the wine and log in here instead. I know that will be hard to do. Any advice about how to make it through the early days of trying to quit drinking would be appreciated!

Thanks again, tra