|
My own theory here I am going to throw out... I think that people in general are attention seekers. Very rarely do you see people that do something for their own pleasure all the time. Some people are mild attention seekers and some are aggressive. The best advice I can give you is if someone is doing something you don't like rather than get upset in front of them or say something right away is to ignore the behavior. When they talk about something you don't like give them a very neutral face and don't talk about it, change the subject if you like but don't refer to those comments. After a while one of two things are going to happen either they are not going to talk about those things because there is never a conversation about it or they are going to ask you why you don't talk about it... Then be straight up. But if you are going to ignore the behavior make sure you "reward" them for things that are pleasing to you. For example lets say they make a racist remark... You don't respond just keep doing what your doing and then they start talking about I don't know... Their new car. Now their new car isn't racist so try to carry a conversation about that. Then eventually they will stop making the one kind of comments and move something more rewarding, a conversation.
Does that make sense? If it doesn't I think I can explain it a different way.
It does work I use it all the time. Sometimes it does take time to work especially of you are not seeing them everyday. As far as saying something directly to the person, as an adult if someone said, "I don't like the way your talking," to me my first response would be, "They can't correct me." Especially if I didn't bring it up. Maybe that is my rebelious nature but everyone is different. But also don't be afraid to stand up for what is right. Be up front if things keep going on the way they are going.
~This is my own opinion on what I would do... Not that it counts~
|