[GiveLove]

In your case, trying, in which you refuse to see him unless he's in some kind of treatment, I think it's different from "no contact." Unless, like ARL, it's "do not write, call, email, or come near me until you have been in treatment and sober for a year."

You seem to be setting a boundary: No efforts at recovery = no possibility of a relationship with me

Be forewarned: "being his friend" sends him the signal that he still has a chance with you no matter what he decides to do. That's very thin ice to tread.

How will you define "getting better"? What is your precise boundary - what exactly does he have to do, and for how long, before he is permitted to contact you again? How many months/years of sobriety must he have? How will you plan to verify this? These are the questions you must clarify. Leaving it all open to interpretation will just hurt both of you in the long run...

Also, what is the boundary if he relapses? What are his consequences?

In my case, "no contact" came when I realized that I wasn't willing to live with the threat of endless relapses and chaos. No contact meant I was done with the rollercoaster. It sounds like you're willing to ride it for a while longer to see what happens, and that's a bit different.