Thanks Wascally and Ahimsa! Happy holidays too. I was honest with him and let him know I couldn't afford it. I haven't heard anything else about it. I was just feeling bad about it. But your right. If its not there to give what can you do. No word on when mother will be out Ahimsa. She's not accepting the deal they offered her at the moment and the court date is set for the beginning of December. I know its partly just the holidays in general too. They were never pleasant growing. Part of me wants nothing to do with them at all and part of me is pretty hurt I haven't heard from a single family member. Even though part of me dreads hearing from them cause they are so dysfunctional. Guess there is that part of me that still wants a family that can be there and be supportive.
I was a mess yesterday so I walked to the park and read and looked at all the beautiful fall foliage. Did me a world of good. Got home and felt all icky again. I'm frustrated with another relationship too. I feel like I've been fairly open about how I feel about one of my roommates and he at times seems to return the feelings and then other times acts distant. Why do emotionally unavailable people seem so attractive? I was trying to give him time and space but I've known him for almost a year. If he can't be clear how he feels now I doubt he ever will be. Time to move on I'm thinking. I'm debating just asking him out right about it. . . . but I don't know. . . . boys!
