Over the years, I have asked folks; do you know what the psychic change is? Have you experienced it? The pursuit of the answer was overwhelming and unobtainable or at least that was my take; maybe it was as real as the resurrection. I just knew that if I solved the mystery of the psychic change, the God thing would be a pushover in comparison.
It has taken years for me to finally understand that the answer to a psychic change is not tangible and patent nor simple; let me rephrase, I took years to surrender. Examples of the change are present in my life now; the desire to drink is gone, thievery is gone, lying is gone, thinking less of others is gone. In the past, I wanted a simple answer, a rational answer and I always wanted it, now. It surely did not come that way at all. In fact the change came from surrendering, over and over. Remember the feeling of not having to tell a lie.
Two words that are sorely misunderstood in AA and in the world are Humility and Surrender. Both of these ideals provide a pathway to peace that is the freedom mentioned over and over by our Sponsors, in our literature and in our meetings. Many mistake humility with its cousin and regard surrender as the quickest avenue to something unspeakable. How easy to understand that if I think less of myself and no longer have the need to be right what a burden is lifted and how free I have become?
To be continued…