Double Winner: Someone who "is" and "is involved" with one too. My sponsors says that in all 12 step groups, "Control should be an Olympic Event". Once sober or clean, everything is an "Al-anon" issue. There are abosolutely no mistakes in God's World so do what you feel is appropriate and learn from it. In my not so humble opinion I believe you are doing the footwork you need to do. Let us know where it takes you, of course, you might find some of us there.