Well, here I am coming in here today to confess to you all, that I have completely gone off the deep end again, in every way.
I hope that I'm not going to discourage anyone here. I went to the beach for a long weekend with my sister, daughter & neice and their children. While there, we had all of these goodies and I just let myself go and then we got back and there were birthdays to be celebrated and I'm like, oh well, I've already crashed, so what the heck. I also noticed that even before that I was doing bad with the food, because I was feeling so physically bad and just didn't seem to have the resolve that I needed to even care. Of course all of these are just the excuses that I let myself use and now here I am feeling horrible.
My face and eyes are swollen and I'm soooooooo tired and I can't seem to make myself get up and get things done in my day that I really need to, but then I have to anyway. My body and joints are painful and I have no energy and just feel really heavy and tired.
Today, August 26, 2007 is the first day of the rest of my life. I have chosen this to be Day 1 for me to stay abstinent from sugar, aspertame, sodas, chips & popcorn. I also plan on starting again with my vitamin regimen. I didn't continue with them after the Dr. put me on steroids a couple of weeks ago. I felt that I was just having to put too many pills in my body. I've decided that I need to think of the vitamins more in the same category as healthy food than a medicine. Maybe then I'll be able to keep myself taking them like I need to. They really do always make such a difference in how I feel, healthwise. I wanted to come here to commit this decision to you all here, so that I can feel held accountable. I hope that I will come in here each day and report my progress and affect. I plan on doing that anyway.
Well, I certainly hope that everyone else here is doing alot better than I am right now. But now I will press on toward my goal of recovery from my Eating Disorder and forward to my new Healthy Life. I hope that each of you will come on this journey with me.