Quote:
Originally Posted by Peter  We all make our own rules and I do not know what rules you have for yourself, but if I were to INTENTIONALLY pick up a joint and smoke it or INTENTIONALLY down a glass of wine, then in my heart I would have relapsed.
Why?
Because my disease of addiction resides primarily in my thinking. It is my thinking which led me to believe that I need a mind and mood altering substance in order to feel good about myself.This is a lie I believed for years
Although I may not become completely stoned from a single glass of wine or from a few pulls on a spliff. I will still have relapsed because my THINKING has changed. When my thinking changes from one of complete abstainance then I stop RECOVERING.
I do not play games with my disease. I understand the baffling and complex nature of drugs and the subtle lure of my cravings.
This is the rule I make for myself. |
Thank you Peter. This is so so true. I have been on the path of recovery now and it's been absolutely crystal clear to me about mind altering substances...I've just come through a tough time sober and I guess I'm wavering and doing that stupid thinking of 'rewarding self' - but yes this is that same old insanity again.
I will post an update after my trip, but all these replies have been so useful, thank you.
Cathy31
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