| Up Up Up
Today I awoke feeling very UP. All in control and super woman/mom mode and happy at the same time.
Its scarey as I skip around my office humming because in my experience everything that goes up must come down.
Im hoping its because my Lexapro was increased to 20 mg about 2 weeks ago and this is the effects which will level but not fall..?
Its weird cause Im thinking my whole life this was me. As a teen I was moody and anorexic, pity me type. But in my mid twenties I was super woman had the whole world in my hnds and no matter what life dealt me I could handle. My dad used to call and worry said I was manic all the time. That lasted about three years and then came spurts of freak out at top of a high and then an extreme low where I could barely get outta bed, this down trips were originally very short lived but as time went on the freak out stage over took the total in control of my life stage and the lows were more frequent. I remember locking myself in the bathroom and crying to calm off afreakout rage stage.
It got to a point where there were no longer highs.
4 years ago I started Topomax (for migraines) but mentally I felt even for the first time since preteen years. After 6 months though I got pregnant and was switched to Zoloft (100 mg) after a year of that and constantly low, I went off everything and 2 years ago I started 10 mg of Lexapro, which finally had me feeling good, but I always stopped taking it, forgot, finances ect. Recently I ended up off of it for 4 months which was a nightmare of emotions between circumstances and imbalance. I went full speed but in sad and sullen ways.
Ive now been on 20 mg of Lexapro for 2 weeks. I feel great but the super woman handle anything feeling I have is scarey, cause I dont want to fall again.
I hope Ill be okay. Today Im super produtive and cheery, the me I always wanna be
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