[Debaucher]

Ok... I got an email from my sponsor...

"call me asap. you need to get a new sponsor"

that is it? I get home... go to my night stand... where I keep his number... and its not there??? then I think... maybe it is in my BB... oh I saved it in my computer too... look everywhere can't find it... anyways... he called my work and left a message... that said "call me"...

Oh well.. the point is I don't know why? I suspect that it is because we just haven't been connecting lately. I have seen him once in the last 2 months... in part because of my vacations and business and in part because he has started going to fewer meetings and the 1 we usually crossed paths at he has stopped going to... I called him and asked if we could get together because I wanted to have a longer chat. He said it would have to be next week... I thought we left it that he would call me... but perhaps he thought I was calling him... either way I could have called him.

My question is... more..I guess I don't have a question I was just hoping to hear some stories about other people who have had more than one sponsor...

I like my current sponsor... we were probably never destine to be buddies but... he had a way of saying things that would make me think and really listen... I guess I really looked up to him and admired him...

I don't know what I feel... of course I don't know why he wants me to get a new sponsor either... but I just don't have strong emotions of any of the possibilities I can think of...

(he has a new sobriety date)...
(he is mad at me for not doing what he thinks I should do... )
(he thinks somebody esle could help me more and give me the time he just can't at the moment...)
(he is moving out of town)
(health issues)

the only thing I feel is similiar to a sense of loss... like I am going to miss him... I feel he is part of me... kind of the way your first girl friend is... you never forget her... oh well... enough said... now I have to find a new sponsor... which in part I don't look forward to because it is a big decision or at least I will make it one... and at the same time I look forward to it...

...

thanks for listening...