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Arcturus · 07-07-2007, 05:09 PM

What a pervasive thing is alcoholism.

I started my first thread a few days ago, detailing my fears and hopes, in regards to my addiction. Within two days I had drank again but resolved to attend a meeting on Friday. I did as planned and left feeling enthused and revitalised. Come today, I have drank yet again.

Deliberately, I have waited to sober up enough to compose this message. Strangely enough, I feel deeply ashamed yet somehow empowered; the mere act of sharing this tells me that my desire to stop hasn't vanished. I've come to understand that 'failing' isn't uncommon and doesn't mean the end of all things to do with recovery.

One thing that helps is the unconditional support of my wife. She sees how much I'm struggling and doesn't even think to judge me. Without her I'm almost sure I wouldn't muster the courage to keep on trying to lead a sober life.

I have an AA meeting tomorrow which I plan to attend, despite tonight's events. As they always say, "keep coming back". I already know that telling my fellow members (as well as you guys) will alleviate some of the guilt and spur me on. Nobody's perfect but as long as the will is there, there's most certainly a way.

07-07-2007, 05:09 PM	#1 (permalink)
Arcturus Member Join Date: Jul 2007 Location: UK Posts: 12	Slipped Up What a pervasive thing is alcoholism. I started my first thread a few days ago, detailing my fears and hopes, in regards to my addiction. Within two days I had drank again but resolved to attend a meeting on Friday. I did as planned and left feeling enthused and revitalised. Come today, I have drank yet again. Deliberately, I have waited to sober up enough to compose this message. Strangely enough, I feel deeply ashamed yet somehow empowered; the mere act of sharing this tells me that my desire to stop hasn't vanished. I've come to understand that 'failing' isn't uncommon and doesn't mean the end of all things to do with recovery. One thing that helps is the unconditional support of my wife. She sees how much I'm struggling and doesn't even think to judge me. Without her I'm almost sure I wouldn't muster the courage to keep on trying to lead a sober life. I have an AA meeting tomorrow which I plan to attend, despite tonight's events. As they always say, "keep coming back". I already know that telling my fellow members (as well as you guys) will alleviate some of the guilt and spur me on. Nobody's perfect but as long as the will is there, there's most certainly a way. __________________ "Religion is something left over from the infancy of our intelligence, it will fade away as we adopt reason and science as our guidelines." Bertrand Russell.