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Please, please do what's right for you. When I was first diagnosed and went to a psychiatrist, my family told me I was weak. I didn't listen and I later realized they're the crazy ones, lol.
May I ask a personal question? Why are you the one getting your little brother ready and off to school? It sounds like you let a lot of people tell you what to do and what's best for you. When I was 19 (boy was that a while ago, lol) I did that too. I think when you're older you'll learn to say no and do what's best for you. I hope so. You sound and look like a sweet, sad girl and you bring out my maternal instincts, sweetie.
P.S. Don't beat yourself up for slipping and using substances. Addicts fall sometimes and beating yourself up isn't going to help.
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