[lanie67]

The first step of AA is that we admitted we were powerless over alcohol and our lives had become unmanageable, so it really doesn't matter if we are unmanageable in spurts or in even intervals. It's like a compulsive gambler who blows $10,000 in one night of poker vs. one who blows a couple thousand 5 nights in a row; in the end they are still equally in the hole. I was powerless over alcohol because I couldn't stay quit, and because I couldn't control what happened when I was under the influence, i.e. I couldn't live with it and couldn't live without it. Baskin Robbins has 32 flavors but in the end it is all ice cream, that is how most AA meetings are; there are people who drank like me, out of control from day one, people who drank socially for 20 or 30 years until an 'invisible switch' was thrown and they became alcoholic, people who drank daily, people who only drank on weekends, people who could go weeks or months without it, people who couldn't go a day without it, people who still had jobs and cars and houses, and people who had nothing. Where I lived when I got sober they always used to say "We don't care if you are from Yale or jail." Great to hear you are going to an AA meeting.