[margo]

Hi Karlee - if your niece is in a school for kids with behavioral problems, one can only hope that she is receiving counselling. Your description of her behavior should be sending up huge red flags to any professional who has dealings with her. Setting fires, having no remorse for inflicting pain on others, inability to show affection, etc, are signs of very serious psychological disturbance. It sounds like you love your niece, and it's admirable that you want to help her, but if she were under my roof I'd be sleeping with one eye open. Whether her problems are due to fetal alcohol/drug exposure is kind of a moot point at this juncture, I would think. What's more important is that she receives the help she needs ASAP before someone ends up seriously hurt (including her). I don't think your fears about her growing up to become a killer are so far-fetched either - it is not unheard of in a background setting like this. If you are serious about helping her, an appointment with a pediatrician in a children's hospital setting would be where I would start. Good luck with this one.