[karlee]

My focus is on my daughter right now.. Then there is my disabled parents, financial situation, other children, and so on. Plus, there is my husband of which I will not go into again...I have actually have taken some steps and am doing better in some ways. However, in other ways I am not.
My major fear is that I do deal with severe chronic pain. I am afraid of having to live life without anything to relieve this pain. The problem is that I expect the pain medication to take away all pain. Well, that is not realistic to think that way. Th pain medication is to take the edge off, but will never completely take it away. I am just in a really bad/mad mood tonight. The brother that tried to attack me a few weeks ago, called me today asking for pills. If I had some, does he even think I will give him some? One medication that he keeps calling me about, surprising I do not really like taking. I know is very addicting...It just not my thing I guess.The things that gets me so mad, is that he will call and call. Does he think I will have a change of mind a few hours or days later? I just want to scream at him...I have forgiven him, but I do not trust him.. Anyway, I am just in a rotten mood and do not feel good. I have a doctor's appointment with my family doctor Wednesday..I still have not reschedule my other appointment for the pyschrist. I have been gone all day today...