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Gmoney · 03-24-2007, 03:50 PM

Congrats on your 6 months and it's very encouraging to know that there are still members willing to do the work necessary to recover, specifically step work.

I hope what I'm about to share with you will help, but if not, please do yourself a favor by continuing to reach out and bringing the topic up at meetings. You'll be pleasantly surprised at the wealth of experience other members have in this area.

For me, when it came to guilt, it was easier for me to let go when I fully accepted the fact that I wasn't responsible for my disease. Since most of the things I felt guilty about occurred during my active addiction, it made sense for me to attribute the stuff I felt bad about to that because had I not been using it wouldn't have happened. At least, I don't believe it would. While I was in the grip of my obsession to use, my thinking and behaviors weren't rational so there had to be some collateral damage.

As a result of doing a 4th step, I became aware of the self-defeating and self-destructive patterns of thinking and behavior, but it wasn't until I got to steps 9 & 10 that I began to experience a greater amount of relief from the guilt and shame. Through making amends and a daily inventory, we make corrections, repair damage (if possible) and hopefully prevent reoccurrence of our wrongs. We can't change the past and have to accept the part we played in it, but initially we can begin to feel some of the burden lifted by understanding that we're not responsible for our disease and totally responsible for our recovery. A key may be forgiving yourself.

Be blessed,
Garry W

03-24-2007, 03:50 PM	#3 (permalink)
Gmoney Evolving Addict Join Date: Jan 2007 Location: New York State Posts: 2,910	Congrats on your 6 months and it's very encouraging to know that there are still members willing to do the work necessary to recover, specifically step work. I hope what I'm about to share with you will help, but if not, please do yourself a favor by continuing to reach out and bringing the topic up at meetings. You'll be pleasantly surprised at the wealth of experience other members have in this area. For me, when it came to guilt, it was easier for me to let go when I fully accepted the fact that I wasn't responsible for my disease. Since most of the things I felt guilty about occurred during my active addiction, it made sense for me to attribute the stuff I felt bad about to that because had I not been using it wouldn't have happened. At least, I don't believe it would. While I was in the grip of my obsession to use, my thinking and behaviors weren't rational so there had to be some collateral damage. As a result of doing a 4th step, I became aware of the self-defeating and self-destructive patterns of thinking and behavior, but it wasn't until I got to steps 9 & 10 that I began to experience a greater amount of relief from the guilt and shame. Through making amends and a daily inventory, we make corrections, repair damage (if possible) and hopefully prevent reoccurrence of our wrongs. We can't change the past and have to accept the part we played in it, but initially we can begin to feel some of the burden lifted by understanding that we're not responsible for our disease and totally responsible for our recovery. A key may be forgiving yourself. Be blessed, Garry W __________________ "We are never forced into relapse. We are given a choice. Relapse is never an accident." - Basic Text, 5th Ed.