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I guess what I am feeling is alot of pain right now. I can't think straight and I have to leave in 30 minutes for work. My mind is going a million miles and hour, i'm shaking because I am so upset. I am trying to not do anything to hurt myself. I just never thought I'd hurt the one man I loved. But I ended up causing him insomnia becuase his mind and gut was telling his heart us dating itsn't right. I said I loved him too soon after he and his fiancee broke up. I think he felt pressured. Now he is takign time to work on himself and I just have this feeling our friendship is going to be gone when he gets back online or I can call him again. I'm just in so much pain right now.
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