(((Swimmer)))
I strongly recomend a book, titled Healing From Family Rifts, by Mark Sichel, our own former Expert here on SR.
You can see it at
www.marksichel.com
There, you will find many helpful ways to deal with this difficult transition in your life.
You don't have to feel guilty. You need only care for your own self.
I'm sorry you are dealing with this, and I wish you only the best.
Shalom!